Poetry Thursday 147 - Not Funny

 A couple of offerings today of a lighter nature. 

Funny

 

After all the words and sentences I’ve learned something about me,

and I’ve been writing stuff for 15 years or more,

I’m not the slightest bit funny.

 

It doesn’t matter how hard I try,

after all the metaphors, similes and so on,

my jokes are the sort to make you cry,

 

Dad jokes but without the punchline,

the intention to amuse is present,

but the skill is not really mine.

 

But writing is the drug of choice,

no wish to go cold turkey,

just hope that someone hears this one small voice.

©David L Atkinson June 2026 

Remember the Emperor succumbing to a grifter's tale that he had a fine suit of clothes, when he was in fact naked. Well, art is open to that sort of grift. 

False foods

 

Had a slice of science training,

learnt a bit of human anatomy,

a smaller chunk of plant biology,

I might sound like I know what I’m saying ,

 

Green stuff is not that good for you.

cell walls contain cellulose,

defined as roughage is close,

appendix no longer able to do what it is meant to do,

so the final outcome is just more poo.

 

Then the fallen one jumps on the green band wagon,

adds a plant to his artillery,

pungent, stringy and full of water,

good for you is celery.

 

Like the emperor’s suit of clothes,

taste is in the eye of the beholder,

each mouthful is no gastronomic rose,

celery needs a cold shoulder. 

 

Speaking of taste, consider the oyster,

who decided this would be good to eat,

in fact a starvation buffer,

now a delicacy to the elite.

©David L Atkinson June 2026  

God Bless 

Writing - Empathy again

 Empathy is the ability to emotionally understand what other people feel, see things from their perspective, and imagine yourself in their place. 

The above is probably an essential skill in being able to create characters and have them interact in a story. It is also a skill some adults actually never mastered. It is currently one of the many criticisms of the President of the United states Donald J Trump. As the definition suggests, this is a complex skill that develops over time, and the young author may find some aspects exceedingly difficult.

That was carried out in the classroom when I used to teach. The task was to have the children write from the point of view of somebody in a story, and the quality of the work that came out was varied. 

 

An example could be the breaking into a home at Christmas as seen through the eyes of the family cat or dog. I know the example would be telling the story of Jesus and trying to go to Jerusalem on a donkey from the point of view of the donkey.

 

The first stage in answering these questions would be to describe the emotions felt at the time. Questions such as how would you feel in that situation are quite useful prompts.

 

Being able to practise empathy brings about the tempering of your behaviour towards other people and hopefully leads you to become a more understanding adult. So you can see why, when writing a story, the skill is important. 

 

When I was writing the Steele novels, my lead character Patrick steagall add to manage relationships between himself and three or four other people and those relationships pertain throughout all 11 books and so weren't stationary but developed and in some cases broke up. From my point of view, I found this one with the enjoyable parts of writing stories. The manipulation of the characters and situations they found themselves in was great fun, or at least it could be and also influenced the direction in which stories progressed.

 

As an exercise for oneself, writing a short story from a different point of view can be a very valuable exercise.

 God Bless 

Poetry Thursday 146 - Ivory Towers

 Another announcement that the energy cap for UK citizens is due to rise. I'm pretty sure that the excuse will be that the cost of buying gas has been increased by our suppliers. I always thought that a cap was supposed to stop unfavourable rises. I'm also pretty sure that the CEOs' bonuses and salaries will not be capped. It would be wonderful if they would refuse their extra salaries and share dividends to help protect the customers. (Just me being naive.) 

Too Many Ivory Towers

 

CEOs of water, fuel and power,

climb down from your glittering, ivory tower,

consider those who are less fortunate,

those who you often manipulate.

 

Academies and Trusts Chair,

is what you’re paid truly fair,

when so many people you employ,

need benefits to bring life a modicum of joy.

 

When asked about your ill-gotten gain,

blaming a committee for what you obtain,

meekly accepting such gross largess,

as a right to your opulent ivory address.

 

Backed by sycophantic politicians,

circling for crumbs to further ambition,

is there a conscience about all that power,

providing your exclusive ivory tower.

©David L Atkinson August 2022 

God Bless 

Writing - Humour

 Over the years, I have read some very amusing books. Some authors are naturally gifted at being amusing, but then there is me! Over the years I have tried to write amusing poetry, I have often been entertained by Roald Dahl, Spike Milligan and Pam Ayres. Similarly, I have enjoyed the writing of Tom Sharpe and various non-fiction writers. 

Porterhouse Blue was a very successful TV series adapted from the eponymous novel by Sharpe. 

I find it difficult to be funny when I am writing, but there is a yearning inside that tempts me occasionally to try. I usually give up fairly quickly. Not that I'm a dour, humourless person, or at least I don't believe that I am, I can be quite witty in a small, understated way, publicly. Writing in an amusing way is a more complex skill, for me. 

This is something that I am unable to offer a great deal of advice on for the previously stated reasons. It would be like me standing up to perform comedy and spouting a series of 'dad' jokes that fall flat. If your feedback suggests that you have a comedic bent in your writing, then go for it; if you believe people find you to be funny in company, it may translate into amusing writing. My advice would be not to force it! 

God Bless 

Poetry Thursday 145 - This History

 Every day that comes and goes becomes part of our history, so we are making history daily. Taking that fact into mind, how will we be seen in 100 years? 

Historical

 

One hundred years from now,

how will life be remembered?

Who was driving the nations plough?

How was the populace respected?

 

Will this time be known as the age of technology?

Will it be for entrepreneurship?

Perhaps the worship of oligarchy,

or the increase in personal hardship.

 

Maybe this time will provide the spark,

to level the living playing fields,

elevating man from the industrial dark,

consolidating too many equality shields.

 

Did Magna Carta teach us a lesson?

Have we learnt from the middle ages?

What was the point of Victorian tuition?

What great mark left on history‘s pages?

©David L Atkinson May 2026  

God Bless 

Writing - Reality

 Being a writer can be a doorway to many different freedoms. This includes the freedom to stretch the truth beyond breaking point. Remember films involving cowboys in the wild west who carried guns that had six cartridges, they'd get into a gunfight and fire hundreds of bullets without reloading. 

Coupled with the never ending supply of ammunition was the physical ability to withstand the effects of being shot. If you consider the damage a projectile does to the human body as it passes through, tearing flesh, nerve damage, breaking bones and ripping open blood vessels, we ordinary folk would probably go into shock almost immediately. Having said all that, we know it is only 'make believe' and being totally accurate all of the time would be boring, so a little licence can spice up the abilities of one's characters. 

On the other hand, the use of a factual description closer to the truth can enhance the quality of the supportive narrative. It is also more fun to stretch the readers' imagination and build some 'magic' into the characters in your stories. There is a danger in going too far or not far enough. Naturally, the effect of stretching the truth and its influence on the reader is very subjective. For some, too much fantasy can be a turn off, for others, you can't go far enough. 

In fact, it is up to the writer as always. If you feel that the flow you create can stand some embellishment, then go for it, and if the opposite is true, take it easy. 

God Bless 

Poetry Thursday 144 - Awakening

 The political atmosphere around the world is at least disturbed and very possibly volatile. In the UK, there are signs that many people are desperate for a change in the system. I believe that is also the case in other countries, not least the USA. Change has already occurred in Hungary. 

Awakening  

There are signs change is coming,  

mist lifting to reveal a watery sun,  

the promise of a positive dawning,  

generating political fun.  

 

Change from younger generations,   

crying out for something different,  

tired of status quo dictations,  

demanding a fairer way to present.  

 

Beware of youngsters energy,  

take care of dangerous choices,  

no space for rampant apathy,  

avoid vested interest voices.  

 

First reclaim national media,  

don’t be fooled by sponsored bias,  

research all aspects of the area,  

avoid opinions of the old and pious.  

  

 

Don’t be swayed by political decadence, 

it’s time to make your choices,  

having examined all the evidence,   

let the nation hear your voices.  

©David L Atkinson May 2026  

God Bless